They still call him "The Elephant"

"See that?" General Maximillion Johanasson asked.

His troops replied with a unanimously, and hearty, "Sir, yes, sir!"

"Know what it is?" was the follow-up question.

A less hearty, "Sir, no, sir."

The general did not smile and began pacing, "That, my boys, is a live satellite image of the most fortified bunker in the entire world. It's got fences made of linked razor wire topped with barbed wire; triple thick doublesteel walls; a camera grid with redundant coverage of every area within a quarter mile; automated defense turrets with machineguns powerful enough to blow a sunroof in a tank."

Now the general smiled, but it was clearly an ironic smile, "And boys, we need to get inside."

Just then the image of the bunker on the satellite exploded. The troops at the base were in an obvious panic and they fled wildly. The troops watching this began cheering, thankful they didn't have to go in there.

One impetuous young lad asked his general, who now carried a mad grin, "Sir, how did this happen?"

"Just watch the image carefully boys, you'll see him any—ah ha! There!" He pointed to a giant silhouette the size of a car lumbering through the smoke and fire.

The impetuous soldier asked another question, "Uhh, but, sir, who, or what, was that?"

"I can answer both of those. He's The Elephant, he's an elephant, and the best damn mammal I have under my command, no offense, soldier."

"They call him The Elephant"...

… said Sergeant Major Colin Buckingham.

"Why's that, sir?" asked the sniveling and forgettable private lucky enough to find himself in the presence of the Army's most innovative officer.

"Because he's an elephant."

The private looked confused. To his mind, elephants were lumbering creature, totally incapable of performing secret missions on behalf of the military. But his mind was wrong. The Elephant was, as his name implied, utterly unstoppable once he'd built up momentum, able to recall even the most minute details of anything he'd encountered before, and proficient in charming audiences with tricks. In short, the stupid private did not realize, when he spoke his next words, that he was insulting the greatest agent the world has ever known out of sheer ignorance. "But wouldn't an elephant make a terrible soldier?"

Sergeant Major Buckingham glared at him. "Evidentially not."